Aug 19, 2011

sourpuss-ing

It's almost 4 in the morning and had my second cup of coffee 2 hours ago and still no plans of going to bed. I already started a post earlier that started with "I am pissed and mad...." but decided just to end it there. My blogging mojo ain't working and once again, that post could've been a major whine which is one of the few things that I'm expert at. So anyway, after cancelling my first post and all done with my take home work load, I decided to visit blogs of people I adore when it comes to their blogging talent. As usual, going through their posts killed an hour of my time and at the same time stirred my once again envious and pitiful emotion.


- Pity because, when I read their posts, it's like they have their life all figured out and my life ain't working that way or which I think otherwise. I mean, I am grateful that my family is not demanding much on what I should do except get all 8's in every subject and to take care of my daughter which I think, is what I'm doing already. Besides this 2, I have the option to do what I want and I noticed that I am more on choosing the boring side of me. I started limiting my social life to 1%, and yes this is by choice. I mean I am happy being who I am now but I feel like the limit is too much that I might grow shells at the back of me for being too boring and might just be a hermit with a wriggler attached, and yes a wriggler alright- in contrast to my daughter's uber hyper mood. My 3 year old daughter has more social life than me and I am happy for her, too happy, ready to be cracked.

- Envious because when I am planning of getting inked with ampersand, someone already did, or when I am dreaming of going to new york to be a fashion correspondent, someone already hopped on a plane and did that ahead of me, or when I am dreaming of wearing something unique, someone already wore it a month ahead of me and I, could go on and on and on blabbing about endless "someone already did it", blogger and facebook often makes me a sourpuss.