Nov 29, 2010

Please, Not Today

My mood swings today are intolerable. I cried twice today, with sobs. I know, I am wondering why too.
Last month, I had my first shot for Injectable Contraceptive. From what I've heard, besides not having normal menstrual flow, I get mood swings and might gain weight. Since this is my second month after the shot, I didn't notice anything new, not until today.

This morning while washing the dishes, a flashback from an incident that happened a week ago made me cry so hard. D was there to console me when I got to the room but he was confused because he doesn't know what I was crying about. Then part 2 of my drama scene happened like 2 hours ago, I sobbed again for no apparent reason. So weird-ed out with myself. I was thinking, I need a shrink asap or just check in to a Psychological rehab if RP has one. I talked to one of my sis and she said that what I'm goin' through is normal, might have something to do with the contraceptive, and definitely because I have been going through a lot this past few weeks.

School has been hard for me not because of the subjects but because I feel like I don't fit in. The term that I used to my sister was "outcast", yep that's how I feel. Outcast simply because I am not into those stuff that they are into. They are still teens and their dilemmas are far more simpler than mine ("mine" meaning my responsibilities as a mom, a daughter and a common-law wife). I talk to them, yes I do, but when it comes to hanging out, smoking the time out and talking about pimples and crushes and what to wear the next day, you know, kids stuff (and you talk about it like over and over again everyday), count me out please, I am way over that stage.

At home, after that bitter spat incident with "her", I got uncomfortable, to the point where I preferred to lock myself inside the room, so as not to see her face. I should not let it bother me that much but I can't help it. If only we have a spare room at my mom's place, we might have moved there long time ago. Another thing is that me and D gets into a fight more often. Not the serious one's though, mostly we fight about petty stuff and when my mood swing kicks in, I get to be a biatch, leveling his being-a-brat mood (him being a bitch is his nature) that the problem prolongs because either one of us wants to lower "the pride". We get to kiss and make up after a day but it's just so tiring especially when my mood swing's level is higher than normal.

I know, I should not let it affect me so much. If we are friends on Facebook
you will notice that I constantly seek for God's words on one application called See Your Message From God, this is what I got today...
...that YOU are the gardner of your soul. Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of expecting someone else to leave you wilted flowers.

... everyday, I get to receive a message and it can totally relate to what I am going through on that day, that's why I never fail to check it. With this,from what I understand, I let others affect my everyday life and that leaves me a wilted flower at the end of the day. I need to cope up with this because if not, I end up feeling like a loser for the rest of my life. Right now, my daughter, God and my family and a few of my closest friends, from them is where I get my strength. Honestly, my everyday thoughts is plotting revenge and cursing at that person who made me feel worthless and that my friend is emotionally tiring, trust me I know.

For now, I need to pull myself together, though I am on the verge of falling apart, I am still thankful that there are a few people who's willing to lend their hearts and ears and that is what I need right now while sorting my thoughts and working on diverting my thoughts to more useful stuff.

That's about it, special thanks to ate T, you're such a dear.

_kBye_

Nov 27, 2010

Nokia C3, I Want!

Weeks ago, during a walking trip along session, we passed by a local cellphone shop and caught a glimpse of this hot pink cellphone inside the glass display stand. It looks expensive so I didn't ask for the price at first but since one of my walking buddy was taking her time talking to an unfamiliar face, I asked the sales lady how much the phone was, I was totally shocked when she said its 6,700 pesos, promise, the phone looks expensive, here's a picture and you be the judge...


...guys, meet Nokia C3 phone. Physical features are mostly the same with a Blackberry phone. For specs of this phone, just click on this link Nokia C3 Phone Specifications.

I don't know about you guys but with the looks of this phone, it looks quite expensive to me, I was expecting like 10k plus, so when I found out it's just 7k, I fell in love with it just like that
. Plus, I am a hundred percent sure that me and this phone are goin' to be compatible for a long time because I get to use it for tweeting and facebook-ing and emailing and other stuff besides texting and calling of course. It also has WLAN which is good, it's gonna save me 50 bucks a day for unlimited surfing. It doesn't have 3G though but that's okei, at least the phone that I have now has one and just in case I get to buy this phone, I ain't planning to sell my Z610i phone though it's painfully looking old, it wont go anywhere, I don't ditch stuff just like that not unless it died on me.

So anyway, the other day, after my P.E. class at Centermall, I passed by another cellphone shop and noticed that they have a mint green color for this kind of phone, I asked for the price and the seller said it's 5,990 pesos. Got skeptical though because from what I've heard, Nokia C3's colors are Slate Gray, Golden White and Hot Pink. I think it is a China phone version, the fact that it's a thousand cheaper than the first one that I saw. One of this days, when I get to go to SM, I'ma go to the Nokia shop and ask for the price.

I am planning on selling my iPod for this (yep I want it this bad since my phone is showing signs that it is ready to retire) but decided not to because this is my one and only reliable companion at school. Since I don't have a job yet, I only have 2 asa-ka-pa options, ask Santa for it this Christmas or look for someone who's willing to loan me 7k and wait for the payment until I get a job without charging any interest. If you are that second option, PM me asap! loljk (no srsly)
.

'til here, have a safe Saturday guys!


_kBye_

Nov 25, 2010

Good Morning Prelims!

It's 3 minutes before 3 in the morning and I am still up. Yep kinakarir is the correct term. I have to though, since this is the first exam, why not make good at it. I have to review on 5 subjects for my Thursday schedule. I'm done with Psycho, a little info on NatSci because our instructor is not much of an elaborate writer on the board, and the one I was working on next is Sociology which will be continued after this post. Since the rest of the people here are all asleep, I get to have the whole house all by myself but noise is limited of course. So here is a glimpse of my review area...


...a blanket, tinky and scattered books and notebooks. Chose to study in the living room because the light is much brighter than in our room, dim light makes me sleepy. Aside from that, when I see someone sleeping, being cozy and all that, I feel sleepy too.

Next set of pictures are stuff that I need for tomorrows exam & also stuff that keeps me awake....


...so first picture is my permit for the exam later, iPod (this here is working so hard to keep me company) and yosi. 2nd picture, again my tinky, a cup of Joe (my second cup for the day) and again pack of cigarettes. This are stuff that helps me keep up today. After posting this entry, I'm thinking of taking an early shower to feel fresh and energized. It's been awhile since the last time I stayed up this late. I'm not planning to sleep today, so far I'm doing good, I almost fell asleep earlier though, good thing I was able to wave away Mr. Zzzz.

So anyway, good morning guys. Wish me luck 'kei!


_kBye-

Nov 24, 2010

Tweeting @ School

A quick post guys.

Happy to know the other day that I can get to Tweet even if I'm not online. My phone doesn't have Wi-fi capability, so outdated I know but happy it still works. Anyway, I guess you wanna know why, yep I am talking to you fellow tweeps. If you have an outdated phone like me, here's how:

Click on this link GladlyCast or Manually go to this site http://gladlycast.com/

I use SMS to tweet, if you were able to open the link, it will ask you to sign in via your Twitter or Plurk account. S
o from there, you will need to select your location, in my case, I chose Philippines. Next, it will ask for your mobile number then you will need to wait for the code which you will type on the site itself to activate your account. Easy as A B C.

I actually have discovered SMS tweeting way back, 2 months ago I think, but didn't use it because I don' have luxury for load, my SMS carrier is Globe so every tweet is like a peso each. The other day though, I found out I can tweet when I registered to unlimited texting and not just any other unlimited texting, it's text to all Network guys! And that's how I started tweeting even if the class in ongoing. Nice right? I think 20 pesos is enough for 200 tweet a day, plus I get to text all my classmates even those who are not Globe users. To all those who don't know yet on how to use the Globe Text To All Network, (take note, this is just for Globe Users), here's how:

On your phone, type SUPERALLTXT 20 then send to 8888. Wait for the confirmation then simple as that, you can text anyone of your friends or just, you know tweet!

Okei, gtg. Till next time!

_kBye_


Nov 11, 2010

Words I Live By

"Sometimes, not knowing anything is better than knowing something unimportant that will only mess up your day."

This are the words I live by today, well maybe until I graduate.

This has been my issue for quite some time now. I am in a great mood, then when I get online, I get disappointed because of what I see. Most of my friends are my classmates before so I am updated with what's going on with their own respective lives, though they are my friends, I tend to not open their profile because they remind me of what my life should be, I am talking about school, like most of them, I should have had graduated already but since I am studying now, I will eventually get there, anyway going back to the quote, it's better to not know what others are up to or how their life has been, but that's just for now, because this is another form of distraction for me, at times I let it affect me so much that I loose track of my main goal. There are other forms of distraction for me but mostly, I stay most of the time online and I only get updates from people I know when I'm online, so lately, I am not into fb-ing. I only log in when I update my status.

Summary: Yep, we know your life is that perfect, if you can, please don't rub it in that much. Thanks!

For students, this makes one great quote right?
So anyway, till here.

_kBye_

Nov 6, 2010

Summary Of My Week

I am so relieved that the week ended well for me. It was a stressful one but not all days except the days before school started.
So this week I got to meet all my teachers for this semester, an interesting batch I say, really, first impression lasts. I think this is goin' to be one fun semester, it should be because I don't have math subject, totally relieved
. Most of the classmates that I have are teens, daym I FEEL so old but good thing I don't LOOK old. Some classmates of mine have unique names too like Kadeji (Ka-de-gee) and Fotini, they are Filipino people, moms this days, 100% effort in giving baby names.
Today I don't have class, this is my first weekend as a student and we already have a lot of home work, so next week, we get to do a lot of reporting. Most subjects that I enrolled has something to do with Phil. History and about the society. I am not happy with the combination of my subjects but I don't have any choice but to deal with it
.
So anyway, I am not gonna start the homework tonight because today is errands-and-family-day. I am done with the laundry but was pissed as hell this morning because people chose to do their laundry today as well. Tsk, so I let them finish first and around afternoon, that was the time I got to start with my chores. People in this place are that understanding, I know.
Pia will be up in a few minutes so the plan is either to watch Spongebob or let her play with the cuzin. If Spongebob is what she prefers, we will be watching it together but if she prefers the second option, I'll try to finish a few homework. D has his own plans tonight, he will be out so I will be having dinner alone again.
'til here guys. Thanks for dropping by.

_kBye_

Nov 3, 2010

Day 1 of School

Second semester this year started today. I managed to get out of bed 5:30a.m.. got to school around 7. Despite the change of rooms, I managed to not be late on my first day. This is the getting-to-know-each-other-week and I get to befriend Jen from Pampanga who's taking up Political Science. She's nice and she talks a lot, I liked her today, hopefully we get to be friends until the end of semester. As expected, there are always those classmates whose brain was stuck during their puberty stage. That annoys me a little and I hope they would not giggle so much because I can't hold my poker face when it comes to that, yep a pet peeve. One teacher asked us to give dislikes and most of the people said, they are not comfortable with people who don't talk much. I was the second one who introduced myself to the class and I mentioned I that I don't talk much. Others may take it as being as a snob, I want to care but I train myself not to, because making friends is not my top priority this semester. Anyway, I had my I.D. done today but before that, I went to have my hair cut, I have a pixie like cut now and with bangs. I don't like what the hair dresser did but I'll get used to it. Now blow drying and hair ironing will be part of my morning routines starting tomorrow.

So I survived my first day. Yay to me (sarcasm aside)!
That's it for today. Goodnight!

_kBye_